Katrina

What can you even say about a city that's never going to be the same?

The closest I've come to a hurricane is the tropical storm that blew through Sarasota right after September 11. When we lived in Miami we escaped them; two weeks after we moved, Hurricane Andrew blew the front doors off the house we'd just sold. And England got hit with a big one while I lived there, but it wasn't really a hurricane. It was just... a storm. Trees blew over, but we handled it. Dad had to miss work because the train station was inaccessible and lots of them weren't running anyway. Seven Oaks cricket ground lost six of its titular trees. But the city's still there. Nothing vanished. No one rioted. No one looted. No one fled.

I donated to the Red Cross. I'm not sure what else to do. It feels helpful to give money, what little I can, especially since I can't give blood or anything on account of the Mad Cow Disease. (Seriously. I'm considered at risk because of the years we lived in England.) But my piddling pennies in the face of everything down there? It feels so insignificant.

And yet at the same time, we're all fine. I'm having a hard time absorbing the magnitude of everything that's going on in New Orleans, largely because it feels so far away. I feel so isolated from this huge swath of our country that's been beyond ravaged. It's like we're in a disaster movie, and it feels really jarring and discordant to leave work like I normally do and go home like I normally do, and watch TV like I normally do, despite the fact that so many people can't do that any more because their living rooms and their TV sets and their cars are under water, or ruined, or looted.

And then I remember weird mundane things. Like the newspaper. When can it even publish again? I imagine droves of reporters from the New Orleans Times-Picayune experiencing a really horrific blend of grief, shock, and yearning to cover the biggest story the region has ever seen. And then I think, "What an awful thing to think -- I'm sure covering the story is not on their minds right now." But, they're reporters, and I'm sure they're having a hard time swallowing their instincts to take notes and write ledes in their minds. Although some of them probably still are finding ways to write it for real. I have a friend who works at the Times-Picayune. It was her dream job; I remember her singling out that newspaper back when we were in college. We haven't been in touch, but I know where she is... or at least I did, until this thing hit. She lived in New Orleans, right near Tulane. A locator graphic says water levels are between three and ten feet high in her neighborhood. She hasn't been able to respond to calls or texts Dan has sent; all we can do is hope she's okay.

Another friend of yore from high school just got married in New Orleans. It was always one of her favorite cities, and so of course that's where she did it, even though she lives in Austin. I just looked at her photo album online. I'm imagining her grieving in front of the news, calling friends -- she had one who went to Tulane; I don't know if she still lives in New Orleans or not -- and mourning all the mental pictures from her memory, and the fact that she can't ever take her kids to the city in which she married their father.

I think that's the weirdest part -- that New Orleans will never be the same. Not for a long time, anyway. The buildings are slowly rotting, the toxic sludge that fills the streets eating away at whatever it surrounds. A lot of the buildings will have to be torn down, if they don't collapse on their own. Life as these people know it will not return for years, and maybe not even then. When you refer to the "near term" here, you're still talking at least three years out. It's mind-blowing.

And then all I come back to is, "I never went there. I never saw it." And I guess in a way I never will.

Comments

[Veronica]

Hey, a blog announces that the Times-Picayune is continuing to post electronic versions despite the fact that they can't actual publish a paper-version. Apparently they've moved their operations to Baton Rouge.

For the blog:
www.joshbritton.com

[Kate]

It was the last paragragh that got me. New Orleans has always been on my "Someday For Sure" list.

[Anna]

I've been reading the Times-Picayune online. If I were at home instead of at work, I'd give you the URL.

You said everything I've been thinking and been unable to articulate. I just... can't comprehend.